Yeah, I've figured the same. She's too nice for her own good half the time. [ which elicits a tiny thread of worry on her behalf from him, but it wavers out easily. the other thing is, the longer kaveh actually explains step by step the more he may pick up that jonas seems to be settling down. it wasn't very obvious to begin with, but it's a little more clear now when the guard drops bit by bit. sometimes you are a person who has a very hard time trusting people and situations. sometimes you don't want to admit that, so when people at least give you warnings...it helps.
there's a noise of interest at that because that's not really a thing he thinks people should understand. it also doesn't entirely fit his mental image of who kaveh is, but he's starting to notice this pattern where he's talking to people and still not entirely sure who they are or what they're like. he had this same realization with shu, actually, which is funnier given they're teammates. even as he lets kaveh get to the preparations he's still talking. ]
I feel like maybe being in school would've been a good enough excuse, but I get the feeling things in Sumeru are really different. [ in terms of status and the like. there's a moment where he's not sure where to go from there, but he does decide to tentatively keep up that line of conversation. ] For a while, it wasn't really that unheard of for me not to go home at night and still have to go to school the next day. Eventually it started being more of a style choice than a cover. I guess I should maybe consider changing that here, but...it's still sort of one of the things that I don't have to think too hard about.
[ it's comfortable, is what he means, when everything else is fucking chaos. ]
[That's fair, tbh. Kaveh also worries about her, though he hasn't figured out a good way to deal with it yet. They're too similar already, but she has an advantage, given that he can't look at her without seeing the god and ruler of his nation.
But since Jonas isn't showing any resistance, Kaveh will guide with a gentle, steady touch. True to his word, the water is lukewarm, as is typical of a salon... but his hands are gentle and efficient, and he hums in acknowledgment as Jonas talks, showing that he's listening. There are a lot of different possibilities that filter through his mind as Jonas talks--none of them particularly pleasant. But for all that Sumeru seems so much better than other worlds he's learned about, it's not as though he's never met or heard of suffering kids before. Granted, Jonas is basically a young adult, but from the way he talks, Kaveh assumes he's been self-sufficient for a while.
But, well. Who is he to judge that?]
Mm. It's not exactly a top priority here. [Even though there's not much for them to do besides wait to die (or kill), Kaveh won't fault anyone for not wanting to bother. He'd meant what he said--that he feels they deserve to take advantage of everything they have for as long as they can--but he'll only encourage people to do so, rather than drag them into it. He hasn't known anyone here nearly long enough to be comfortable doing that yet.
After a moment:] Unless you have someone you'd like to impress, I guess, in which case we might have to change our strategy.
There's always something else. [ close to an agreement, at least. it's not a top priority because there's always something happening or someone changing things. he doesn't flinch from the water, and he says pretty still while kaveh's hands work even with the little tendrils of dread that blip in and out. do or die has always been the name of the game.
but simultaneously, they do have several days before then to take time to do other things. if people can find pleasure in other things, that's all the encouragement jonas needs to think about trying it themselves.
even if it's a joke, there's a weird squiggle of an unidentifiable emotion that settles on embarrassed briefly before dropping away entirely. ]
Right. Yeah, changing a look would be enough to change an impression. [ it's a joke back. ] Can't say there's anything like that, really. Not that I'd blame anybody that did have a case for that.
But Jonas has been kind enough not to comment on any of Kaveh's emotions, so Kaveh will return the favor, at least for now. True to his word, he's quick; once he's done washing Jonas's hair, he dries his hands, then hands Jonas a towel so that he can dry his own hair. Let him have a break from being touched before Kaveh starts on the trim.]
Now or never, you mean? [He hums thoughtfully.] I'd agree with that.
[Not that he'd ever dissuade it anyway, but truly, far be it from him to tell people they shouldn't look for love in their final days.]
[ sometimes you run very fastly from your emotions and also the emotions of other people. he can respect kaveh minding his own business, even with the beat of gratefulness in his emotions when the man hands over a towel and takes a step back. all of this has been fine, but the space is much appreciated and slightly needed. ]
Never, really, but also especially now. If finding happiness in someone else helps make a miserable existence less miserable, then sure. Who are we to stop them? [ toweldrying, toweldrying. ] Or even people who're using love as their motivation to find their way back.
[Sometimes you are simply a volatile and emotional creature who lashes out and runs away just as often as you crave friendship and touch, so you're pretty good at gauging emotions even when they aren't leaking out. He busies himself with checking the scissors to make sure they're the right type, since he doesn't know what clippers are.]
It's not the most romantic way to phrase it, [very lightly teasing, here] but yes, I think that's true. [A little melancholy, then.] I can't fault anyone for having a reason to fight, especially when that reason is love.
[ yeah i'm sorry that i have to say that this is a mood for both of them. it's something of interest, the way kaveh handles these things. it's something maybe he'll poke around later. ]
You get what I mean, shitty wording or not. [ but he pauses as he thinks on it. ] Plus there's the idea that love means many things. [ he raises an eyebrow, gauging kaveh again. ] You don't have to tell me what it is. But you have a reason, right?
I do. [Get what Jonas means. When he thinks there's probably been enough time, he turns back to Jonas, scissors in hand, looking contemplative as he decides what to say.]
I want to try and find some way to save as many of us as I can. [He settles on.] For now, that's my reason.
[He doesn't know if he could bear the cost of survival if he only thought about his own future. There's no way he can view himself as worthy of dozens of lives.
Also:] Would you rather I start from the front, or the back? [He thinks probably the front, given how skittish Jonas is, but he'll leave the choice up to him.]
[ it's a respectable answer. for a moment, jonas looks at kaveh as if he's trying to assess if it's true or not. and after a few moments longer, he nods. ]
Front's fine. Just a little. [ is what he says first, because yeah. he would prefer to know what's happening at the moment. it's only when kaveh approaches with the scissors and looks like he's close to starting that he speaks up again. ]
Pretty sure that's Alex's goal, too. So I get it. It's not a bad reason.
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ohthehumanities) wrote2023-06-16 10:38 pm
no subject
there's a noise of interest at that because that's not really a thing he thinks people should understand. it also doesn't entirely fit his mental image of who kaveh is, but he's starting to notice this pattern where he's talking to people and still not entirely sure who they are or what they're like. he had this same realization with shu, actually, which is funnier given they're teammates. even as he lets kaveh get to the preparations he's still talking. ]
I feel like maybe being in school would've been a good enough excuse, but I get the feeling things in Sumeru are really different. [ in terms of status and the like. there's a moment where he's not sure where to go from there, but he does decide to tentatively keep up that line of conversation. ] For a while, it wasn't really that unheard of for me not to go home at night and still have to go to school the next day. Eventually it started being more of a style choice than a cover. I guess I should maybe consider changing that here, but...it's still sort of one of the things that I don't have to think too hard about.
[ it's comfortable, is what he means, when everything else is fucking chaos. ]
no subject
But since Jonas isn't showing any resistance, Kaveh will guide with a gentle, steady touch. True to his word, the water is lukewarm, as is typical of a salon... but his hands are gentle and efficient, and he hums in acknowledgment as Jonas talks, showing that he's listening. There are a lot of different possibilities that filter through his mind as Jonas talks--none of them particularly pleasant. But for all that Sumeru seems so much better than other worlds he's learned about, it's not as though he's never met or heard of suffering kids before. Granted, Jonas is basically a young adult, but from the way he talks, Kaveh assumes he's been self-sufficient for a while.
But, well. Who is he to judge that?]
Mm. It's not exactly a top priority here. [Even though there's not much for them to do besides wait to die (or kill), Kaveh won't fault anyone for not wanting to bother. He'd meant what he said--that he feels they deserve to take advantage of everything they have for as long as they can--but he'll only encourage people to do so, rather than drag them into it. He hasn't known anyone here nearly long enough to be comfortable doing that yet.
After a moment:] Unless you have someone you'd like to impress, I guess, in which case we might have to change our strategy.
[He's joking]
no subject
but simultaneously, they do have several days before then to take time to do other things. if people can find pleasure in other things, that's all the encouragement jonas needs to think about trying it themselves.
even if it's a joke, there's a weird squiggle of an unidentifiable emotion that settles on embarrassed briefly before dropping away entirely. ]
Right. Yeah, changing a look would be enough to change an impression. [ it's a joke back. ] Can't say there's anything like that, really. Not that I'd blame anybody that did have a case for that.
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But Jonas has been kind enough not to comment on any of Kaveh's emotions, so Kaveh will return the favor, at least for now. True to his word, he's quick; once he's done washing Jonas's hair, he dries his hands, then hands Jonas a towel so that he can dry his own hair. Let him have a break from being touched before Kaveh starts on the trim.]
Now or never, you mean? [He hums thoughtfully.] I'd agree with that.
[Not that he'd ever dissuade it anyway, but truly, far be it from him to tell people they shouldn't look for love in their final days.]
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Never, really, but also especially now. If finding happiness in someone else helps make a miserable existence less miserable, then sure. Who are we to stop them? [ toweldrying, toweldrying. ] Or even people who're using love as their motivation to find their way back.
no subject
It's not the most romantic way to phrase it, [very lightly teasing, here] but yes, I think that's true. [A little melancholy, then.] I can't fault anyone for having a reason to fight, especially when that reason is love.
no subject
You get what I mean, shitty wording or not. [ but he pauses as he thinks on it. ] Plus there's the idea that love means many things. [ he raises an eyebrow, gauging kaveh again. ] You don't have to tell me what it is. But you have a reason, right?
no subject
I want to try and find some way to save as many of us as I can. [He settles on.] For now, that's my reason.
[He doesn't know if he could bear the cost of survival if he only thought about his own future. There's no way he can view himself as worthy of dozens of lives.
Also:] Would you rather I start from the front, or the back? [He thinks probably the front, given how skittish Jonas is, but he'll leave the choice up to him.]
no subject
Front's fine. Just a little. [ is what he says first, because yeah. he would prefer to know what's happening at the moment. it's only when kaveh approaches with the scissors and looks like he's close to starting that he speaks up again. ]
Pretty sure that's Alex's goal, too. So I get it. It's not a bad reason.