catchall; wolfwood

[ohthehumanities]

I don't know trigun help

Comments

[ohthehumanities]

[It's Kaveh's turn to listen (or, well, read), which he does with patience and curiosity. Theology may not be his area of focus, but the gods are tied so intrinsically to the functions of his world that it's fascinating to learn about them elsewhere.]

I suppose.
Though, to be honest, I kind of lost faith a long time ago. Even now, I don't think I'd turn to my archon for personal guidance as a first impulse.

[Not that he doesn't trust her, of course. It's just... complicated.]

[crucifer]

What do you believe in then?
Who do you turn to might be a better way to ask.

[ohthehumanities]

[That's an excellent question, honestly. There's a long delay before he replies.]

I guess I just... don't.

Maybe it would be more accurate to say I try not to. I've been shown a lot of kindness by the people around me, but I don't enjoy needing to rely on it.

[It's hypocritical, he knows, when he would give everything to someone who needed him without a thought to judgment. But he's only human, after all. Emotions aren't so logical.]

[crucifer]

Self-sufficiency then.

[ As short and concise as ever, but this is a stance Wolfwood respects. ]

[ohthehumanities]

Yes! Exactly.

[It doesn't really come through over text, but he's relieved that Wolfwood understands.]

Alhaitham argues with me about my ideals all the time. He once said that no matter how strong of a swimmer you may be, you'll still get dragged under by those who are drowning eventually, once you run out of stamina. To him, that's the inevitable fate of idealists. But I believe there will always be people in the world who will help others. I've run out of stamina before, and I've been fortunate enough to have found those people who were willing to pull me back to shore. Maybe my prayers weren't answered, but that doesn't mean I was abandoned by the whole world.

But even so--in the end, who wouldn't prefer to pull themselves out of the water on their own strength?

[crucifer]

[ There's another pause here before the typing dots appear. ]

Sorry to say but I think I'm the type to agree with your friend.
If there's a 9/10 chance that I'll drown by helping someone, well.
I've got things I want to protect more than some strangers.
But yeah. I'd pull myself out of the water.
Have done it and will keep doing it as much as it takes.

[ohthehumanities]

[Hmm, well. There's a lull, but then--]

Things like what?

[Another short pause, and:]

You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.

[crucifer]

[ Well, he wouldn't normally be sure about saying so, but since he did technically say it on the public already... ]

Kids.
And home.

[ohthehumanities]

[I keep trying to tag this serious and deep conversation but people are kissing in my top level and you guys are stealing balls HELPPPP]

I don't know. I don't think that's so different from my thinking. You're still looking out for other people--just people who are closer to you.

[Which is... normal, he thinks. And beyond that, he remembers Wolfwood saying, before: I care for others plenty, actually. I'd say it's what keeps me going. Alhaitham would never say something like that, which is the key difference, in his view.]

But I don't really expect everyone to be like me anyway. I do think it's a basic human responsibility to offer help when you can, but I wouldn't expect someone to sacrifice their loved ones for strangers.

[Which is part of the reason this game is so hard for him to deal with.]

[crucifer]

Kids are different.
They're selfish, but not in the way adults are.

[ He frankly, cares so little about the average person. Humans are rotten, ready to backstab the moment it works out better for them. Kids are different to him -- they don't know what real harm looks like. Adults do, and still do it anyway. ]

I said it before but you and blondie would get along.

[ohthehumanities]

You know, I wonder, sometimes, if that's why Nahida looks the way she does.

[Nobody knows why Nahida is baby... not even Nahida...

But he remembers that blondie is Vash, so--]

Yes, I'd say we do. We talked a little after the trial--I appreciate his determination.

[crucifer]

She is pretty tiny.
Yeah, from the hardcore drinking to even this whole outlook about there being good in the world.

[ohthehumanities]

Maybe we're siblings and never knew it.

[Kaveh has no siblings but honestly he doesn't think Vash would be a bad one]

[crucifer]

Ugh. No.
No siblings. Though I think you would make a better brother.

[ohthehumanities]

[He doesn't know how to convey laughter over text]

Why do you say that?

[crucifer]

[ He said too much, actually. ]

Would rather have a sibling that's just like you and gets along, yeah?

[ohthehumanities]

I'm not sure, honestly. I don't have any, so it's kind of difficult to imagine.

[The truth is that no, Kaveh does best with people who push him; he thrives off of the challenge of intellectual stimulation and debate. But he would need a much more honest view of himself to be able to acknowledge that, let alone admit that so openly.]

If I had to choose, I'd say it would be nice to have someone around who understands me, though.

[crucifer]

[ He considers that. ]

Yeah.
That would be nice.
Doesn't have to be a sibling to do that though.
Or blood-related at all.

[ohthehumanities]

That's true.

[A lull, as he turns the thought over in his head. It's an old, familiar want.]

Do you have someone like that?

[Maybe it's too pushy, but--well. He thinks Wolfwood is probably the type to be clear about it if he doesn't want to answer something: either to say so explicitly or to redirect in a clear enough way that it's easy to pick up on. Given that, maybe it's okay to be a little less cautious with his thoughts and questions.]

[crucifer]

Livio.

[ He doesn't say Vash because wow, that is complicated over there. ]

[ohthehumanities]

[Kaveh 🤝 Wolfwood
It's Complicated

This is a great answer, though, because Kaveh would die for Livio actually]

Oh, are you from the same place too?
He's very sweet.

[He's glad Wolfwood has him around--but he doesn't say it, because he assumes Wolfwood would also prefer Livio to be alive.]

[crucifer]

From the same planet.
From the same orphanage.
He wasn't there for long but once a part of it, always a part of it.

[ohthehumanities]

[Oh, yikes. His heart aches with sympathy and guilt, and he's halfway through typing I'm sorry before he pauses, then deletes it, in case it comes off as rude.

When was the last time someone pulled people like them to shore?

"I wish you could do less meaningless things. Some people will succeed and some will fall, that's how the world works. Why interfere with it just to act like a goody-two-shoes?"

He pushes the thought away.]

No wonder you're both so resilient. [Is Livio resilient?? Sure we can give him that.] Was Vash there as well, or did you meet him later?

[crucifer]

[ He's definitely resilient just so dumb... the way that Wolfwood is basically forced into being the braincell is killing me, he's also stupid!! ]

I've only known him for two or three years.
Technically.
For actually being around each other, less.

[ohthehumanities]

[STOP I'M CARE HIM bongos his head like a drum.]

Ah, I understand.
It's kind of similar with my friends back home, actually. We all attended the Akademiya, but we didn't all meet there. I didn't meet Cyno properly until my friend Tighnari introduced us, but they've been very close for a long time.